How Do You Want To Feel?

It’s seven a.m. here in Georgia, and I’m sitting on my back porch waiting for the sun. Over the last week, Spring has brought new life to the view from where I’m sitting and, with it, the promise that a new season is upon us. Slowly emerging buds have awakened into a parade of verdant hues stretching toward a sky that is, finally, more often blue than gray. And the cherry trees, hesitant only a few short weeks ago, are, at last, in full bloom. Everywhere you look, their delicate petals drift through the air as evidence of their long-awaited return. Already, I can tell today is going to be another amazing day.

Yesterday, The Greatest Kid On The Planet and I started the day with a late breakfast of pineapple pancakes, and then there was online learning to be done. Afterwards, we spent a good part of the afternoon throwing around a football. I couldn’t have asked for a better day with my kid. I know so many are struggling through the current situation, and I pray for anyone who finds themselves in hardship during this time. For me, I’m grateful The Greatest Kid and I are safe and well, and I love having him at home with me. I’m trying to savor every moment while I can.

These days, I stay away from the media. There is no CNN in our home, no local or world news. I’ve never been one to take more than a glance at the headlines, but, right now, I stay away from even those. Fear, panic, and blame seem to be the order of the day, and with so much of it circulating around us, I’m feeling, more than ever, the need to protect my inner peace.

This is a conversation I seem to be having with a great many people, especially over the last few weeks. In February, I published a post about the difference between hurt and hate and how we get to grace, and I wrote that we can choose not to take the actions of others personally, but, rather, give grace to those who act in a hateful or hurtful manner. I was surprised by the number of emails I received following that post and by the sentiment shared by so many who find themselves struggling with grace and, sometimes, forgiveness.

While most agree giving grace is best, both for ourselves and for others, it isn’t always easy to do. We would like to think we’re above it all, but we are not immune to the words and wiles of other people and to all that is going on around us.

So, at a time when so many, it seems, are hell bent on spreading anger and hatefulness, and with so much negativity coming at us from every direction, how do we guard ourselves against it?

This is a question I hear often, and my answer is always the same. Pour out love. In every situation. Under every circumstance. Even when it’s hard. Even when it hurts. Even after you’ve been disappointed. Especially if you’ve been disappointed. And especially when you don’t want to.

It sounds simple and impossible at the same time. How do we pour love into every situation?

Perhaps, it is as easy as understanding when we pour out love to others, we are, in fact, showing love to ourselves. And showing love to ourselves means being conscious of our thoughts, how they affect our actions, and the way they make us feel.

What I believe is true for so many of us is that we’ve become accustomed to allowing our thoughts to choose themselves, and often they are a reaction to whatever is occurring around us. And we seek neither to censor nor control them. This seems especially true with the negative thoughts we entertain. We grab onto one unsavory notion and, in no time, it begins to grow and gain momentum, and it makes way for another and then another, and, before long, we are not entertaining a single idea, but an overwhelming feeling of anger, dread, and dismay.

Letting our minds wander, and respond to every incident that comes about, can be a hard habit to break. But we can make the deliberate choice to be kind to ourselves by guarding our thoughts. And this means caring so much about how we feel that we choose thoughts which make us feel good and serve us well.

We can choose to replace inner turmoil and uncertainty with thoughts of hope and well-being.

We can concede fear and panic do nothing to change our circumstances for the better, and, instead, choose to reach for faith and gratitude.

We can recognize blame and bitterness do not heal our hearts or enhance our lives, and we can choose to embody forgiveness, hope, and healing.

And we can tune out the hatefulness and anger circulating around us and elect not to respond in kind, but rather, pour out love instead.

These days, more than ever, peace and tranquility are at the forefront of my mind, and I’ve become adamant about protecting my inner peace. I know I can decide how I feel each day, and at each and every moment, simply by the thoughts I choose.

I am also a firm believer that we shape our own reality, and our thoughts and our intentions can change the momentum, not just of our own lives, but the lives of everyone around us.

And, most importantly, when we pour out love and gratitude, the Universe responds and sends them back to us in great measure.

So, if this is true then, and I believe it is, looking around at where we all find ourselves today, I have to wonder, what would happen if we all made the deliberate choice to entertain only positive, uplifting thoughts?

What if we cared so much about what we projected to others that we spoke only words of hope and encouragement?

What if we cared so much about our inner peace that we showed only love and kindness and grace to everyone around us?

How would the Universe respond to all of us then?

It’s true we cannot predict the actions of others, but we can choose how we let the actions of others affect us and whether or not we internalize them.

And we cannot control every situation that occurs around us, but we can choose how we react.

We can choose to live in a state of panic, fear, and foreboding, or we can choose, instead, to believe everything is going to work out for the best because it always does.

Sadly, as a society, it seems we are, to some degree, addicted to drama and hostility. But before we tune in to CNN, or scroll through the headlines and what’s trending on Twitter, we can ask ourselves how we’re absorbing it all, and how we are releasing it back out into the world. And is it helping us, or is it harming us?

Because the choice, really, is ours.

What better time to begin guarding our thoughts than the circumstances we find ourselves in today? What better time to begin choosing hope over hopelessness and faith over fear?

In all that is going on around us, and in all that is yet to come, what better time to do away with hatefulness and anger and bitterness and, instead, choose to show love and kindness and grace?

What better time than now, in these moments and the moments ahead, to be kind to one another?

And what better time than today, and each and every day, to be kind to ourselves?

M.C. Greene

This lovely photo was taken by Robin Spielmann

P.S. This Is What I Know